Misleading title, I'm actually responding to the Future Diplomat's sexual morality posts. My response on his blog became too lenghty, so I moved it here.
I see where F.D's coming from and in many ways I can relate to many of his rants. I do go to church (every week in fact, unless I absolutely have something else going on) and I'm very active in that I run the PA system, PowerPoint, coordinate worship service and all the behind-the-scenes things that go to make the service a smooth and enjoyable one. For many observers on the outside, I am a committed christian and many guys around here know me as a "church girl". In reality, that's far from the truth and the only reason I do all those things is that I am good at it and the church could use someone that's willing to do it on a regular basis rather than relying on a volunteer from week to week. I've volunteered at hospitals, my school, at work, and to me, volunteering in church when they need a volunteer is no different. Anyone that's ever cared to ask me about my religious beliefs knows that I go to church out of tradition and not because I consider myself religious, "saved", or any of that stuff. It's just one of those things I've always done.
One of the things about christianity and all this morality bullshit that F.D points out is the hypocrisy that goes along with it. He raises a lot of interesting questions like who decided what books to put in the bible and which ones to leave out, why female sexual freedom is frowned upon etc. Personally, I got to the point in my life where I said fuck religion, fuck culture, I refuse to let those things dictate who I am and how I live my life. Yes, I'm that girl that requires her man to know how to cook and clean cuz I'm no one's housegirl. That I got from my dad. He's the best cook in my family and he's always happy to cook for us and does all the cleaning, even when my mom's around; not your typical African man.
I love masturbating and I'm not ashamed of it, and Steve and I do watch porn together occassionally and it's fun. Quite frankly, I think it's a little creepy to watch porn alone. I am very sexually expressive and uninhited, a fact that's surprised many of the guys that I've dated that always thought I was a timid "church girl". The more reason I am proud of my self-control and the fact that I waited until I was 22 to have vaginal intercourse, something that would have otherwise happened when I was 14.
Where does all this fit with the christianity and culture I was taught to follow when I was a kid? Absolutely nowhere because to some extent I'm sick of the hypocrisy that goes on within these two institutions. I would rather do some of these things out in the open and not be tormented by guilt than be the first to cast a stone when I'm engaging in "immorality" behind the curtain. I believe one can be a decent human being with a good heart without necessarily being religious. So stop with the stone casting already. F.D. you go on and do your thing. You don't have to defend yourself or justify your posts. If someone doesn't like what you wrote, they can go blog about it on their own blogs.
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I'm skipping town this afternoon after the funeral and I can't wait. I'm in need of a break after the week I've had. Especially at work. The damn FDA was around this week and that put everyone on edge and the work environment was totally unfriendly, not to mention the long hours spent there. Thank God my weekend started off right by going to dinner with Steve. He was looking yummy for sure, all dressed up. We had a great waitress who regaled us with hilarious stories of some of the weird patrons she's served before (my favorite was the couple that left a note on their tab asking if she would be willing to have a threesome with them. They even left a number) and at the end of the night, she got a humongous tip. All in all, the three figure dinner bill was worth it and after some great sex, Steve and I fell asleep out of sheer exhaustion. Talk about a chilled out birthday. Now have yourselves a wonderful weekend!
22 comments:
mmm.... I've been going to church for a long time now - where have you been then?
Joking.
True we have to respect others - I don't a gree with what many write on THEIR blogs. But that's me not perfect but choosing what I considered 'readable'
Honestly where have you been then...
Have great sex or is it weekend - okay both.
hi first I was so tickled by the move made to the waiteress and you and steve sleeping sheer exhaustion. Now to comment on what you just said about my posts, I was not really trying to defend myself but rather to be more coherent. My first post was a rant and I did not put it into good perspective and people cold mistake me to be this sex repressed guy trying to come out. the subsequent entries were to put everything in a better perspective. I am glad we are like minded, now how do I put a link to my site for people to see your response
why is it people think that church is about being perfect.when jesus walked the earth he made it clear that he came to save the lost.just as a doctor comes for the sick
church is not about being perfect church is like a hospital.if you go to a hospital you must expect to find sick people . the same applies to church the bible is clear that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.hence the issue of morality really isnt an issue since we all fail.being in church and going to church should be a personal experience with God , a time to repent,praise and than God for his mercy.
ON OUR WALK
The word of GOD is indeed clear on the type of life we are expected to live. The diffrence between human being then is this
1.people who sin and recognize that they have sinned and offended God.
2.people who sin and try and justify their sin.
clearly both have sinned and none is good but those who recognize their sin have an opportunity to repent and have their sin forgiven.The Bible is indeed clear that if we confess our sins God is faithful and just and he will forgive(1 JOHN 1:9) but if we feel no shame for our sin then we set up ourselves for a dangerous confrontation with God that we can not win.
even apostle paul talked of the fight against flesh and the difficulties of doing what you dont want to do and doing the bad. i am not one to judge people when it comes to sexuality but i do pray that God will give you the wisdom to see what is right and to do what He requires.
Alway remember that one of fundamental difference between those who are saved and those who arent, is that saved people recognize they are sinners and repent for their offences towards God.
It is not about being perfect it is about recognizing our imperfections and seeing the need for Gods perfecting through jesus .
future diplomat-
ps i am not being judgemental but being a wanker hadly qualifies as being something to be proud of( i am just saying it hear coz u deleated my post)
I will tell you why I deleted the comment Joe (sorry Sis for using your blog) Of all I wrote you summation was that I am a wanker, I said I have masturbated and I do still, nothing to be ashamed about. Trust me its healthier than other ways in this hiv infested world. Again I deleted it coz I was talking about sexual liberty and your whole response was "oh My God I cant believe you just admitted to wanking"
Dude its not a fight! all i said is what i have said here i dont think my words were "oh My God I cant believe you just admitted to wanking"
i think i just said you are a wanker.seeing as you are proud of it in your post there was no need to deleat my comment
you are a wanker !
Joe, do you wank? why is that such a big deal of all of the things I wrote, I wrote about represiveness on women sexuality, questioned monogamous sex, dabled on watching porn issues, talked about church's history and sex and sir with all respect all you got is to rephrase
"you are a wanker"
Anyway lets go back to my blog before sisBigbones chases us out
FD LOL why would i drink wine from my shoe when i have wine glass in the kitchen.and even if i didnt why would i go announcing and being proud of my not having glasses and using my shoe(fake wisdom parable) but you get what i am saying
like i said its not a fight. i was just contributing to the topic.i am from the old school where men are men,. and as such they carry themselves like men in public. this business of being wankers is a new generation.
*now holding my peace and forever more
ok
Watu wengi wa kanisa hupenda kuhubiri maji kumbe wanakunywa vinwaji!
There is nothing wrong with doing what you do but be what you say you are. People shouldn't pretend to be holier than thou when they are just as sleazy as the rest of us.
Back to mwenjoyo!
BTW I have to read Joe's comments! Dude makes my day!
Bwehehehehehehehe!!!!!!!!! That was some good battling up in here!
Joe I don't see how repeating a line like a playground kindergaten kid 'contributes' to an argument
From my experience the Bible is a law that works, just like the law of gravity. I am human ofcourse and I sin constantly but being a christian and going to church has kept me out of trouble and blessed me and my whole family so I can't knock it.
Glad that your dinner went well and LMAO at the waitress being approached for a menage-a-trois.
@Kenyangal...ur first comment had me in stitches..LOL!!
FIGHT! FIGHT! (damn, it's over)
enyewe pelekeni vita kwingine. reminds me, in primo we had a place we went to fight after school. we called it 'black house'. anzisheni 'black blog' (bulb lights up...hmmm)
sis, christianity and sexuality tend to rub a few dicks (if i may) the wrong way. touchy territory. but keep doing what you do sista. tuko wagonjwa wengi.
WELL-IN about this post in particular the church and cultural impositions...hmmm its thought provoking to say the least...many of us have been socialized with religion taking the high seat on the moral pedestal, most not understanding why what where but 'i gotta go to church because thats just the way it's always been'...i challenged myself a while back to step outside of christianity and explore different faiths, in particular budhism, islam and jewish...this prompted me to get a clearer understanding of my own so that going to church ceased to be a function but more communing with my spirit and now i'm ranting so....
I was here but left silently without contributing to what i call a thorny debate. I do go to church.
I love God more than i do anything else. And once a while,we talk and i tell him he shouldnt do something like cause suffering to people i love, and he guides me what to do.
Religion and Sexuality is one thing that can be discussed till the cows go home. Fornication is not allowed in the bible but don't we know what happens.
For sure you can't fight with God, He will always win. Thats what i know. But God created sex for muenjoyos.
I am out!
This debate is hot! let me reserve my comments first, but I like ur bravery!
heh, clearly this debate which was a day rant has continued kabisa, lol
@F.D. some topics are thought provoking, don't you think? You got me thinking for sure, I'll give you that much. I think I came up with a coherent response to all these topics. Stole your idea and made it a post :)
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